December 31, 2007

Prime Outlet Mall

Some cousins and I went to the outlet mall today. It wasnt as great as I expected. THe stores were all pretty boring. Things like Banana Republic and Ralph Lauren Polo. Even the Gap was really annoying, with all these bright ugly colors...but finally i found a great pair of boots
, a 3/$10 deal on soaps at Bath and Body Works (I got Midnight Pomegranate, Japanese Cherry Blossom, and Sweet Pea), Lincoln Park After Dark (a really really really dark purple OPI nail polish)
and a ridge filling base coat for nail polish, and last but not least a Pirates of the Caribbean 3 DVD and the soundtrack of the first Lord of the Rings movie. It was good.

The family is leaving tomorrow. Its a relief in the way that i will finally be able to relax (even though i actually wont since I need to finish my application to Deerfield) but I loved having them here, it was so much fun. We had sushi tonight (except for me, because I hate sushi, I had teriyaki chicken) and Katie, Jess, and I painted our nails and watched POTC3. It was good. Oh, and we had Key Lime Pie.

I have GOT to clean my room RIGHT NOW because otherwise it wont happen.
“If a cluttered desk is a sign of a cluttered mind, what is the significance of a clean desk?"
-Dr. Laurence J. Peter

December 30, 2007

Family in town and impulsive bowling.

The other night was wonderfully fun. Began with watching my cousin playing Spyro on Playstation. Yes, the old spyro. Then we were just sitting around eating and talking about the craziest stuff...making fun of each other, being crazy. Then my oldest cousin's girlfriend came up with this idea that we would go bowling. This all went down at my Mom's cousin's house. Now, none of us had socks. We had to go to Target to buy socks, so we all picked some out and then we also got some for the guys, who had stayed in the car.
So we went bowling. It was so much fun. Totally hillarious. The girls and I were dancing and crazy and I was terrible, absolutely terrible, but there was this one turn i took where i was channeling some...bowling God or something, and i hit like...9 pins. Then it went back to normal and I sucked again.
After all this Katie and Jess slept over at my house and K and I knitted and sat around and talked and Jess went to sleep early. It was good.

Then today. Today, we went canoeing. Now, I had never really gone canoing before (how on earth do you spell canoing...) and so when my cousin and I got into the boat and had to row back across the widest part of the lake against the wind, all did not go well. Katie and I started yelling at each other and got really pissed. Before all this, we had been rowing along singing and zig zagging and at one point we were pushing of the ground because it was too shallow for us to paddle otherwise...but so we were yelling at each other and rowing across this was intense. We had lunch, which was ok, but heavy and then we went to see Sweeney Todd. As you know from my previous post, I loved this movie. Loved. They...did not. I felt really bad because i sort of dragged them into seeing it..and it sucked because..well whatever. It didnt go as planned. Today wasnt so great. Maybe we are all getting sick of each other. But either way, I am knitting a scarf for myself and it is coming along nicely.

I've recently been feeling more of my old romantic...whatevers. Now that I have pretty much finished my Application to Deerfield, I feel like I can devote more attention to somebody. The only thing that gets in the way is that right now I am feeling a little like everybody hates me, and damn that sounds really stupid, but I just feel...out of favor. Ah well, what can one do. And now I have a really...depressed cynical feeling that the next semester is going to be terribly boring. I mean, what is going to happen in such a time, and then Im leaving. God. I am depressed tonight. Dammit.


'Give me a man who is man enough to give himself just to the woman who is worth him. If I were that woman I would love him alone and forever.'
-Francesca Bruni (played by Sienna Miller) in the movie Casanova

December 25, 2007

Sweeney Todd

I just went to see it in theatre. Amazing movie. Great cast. Directed by Tim Burton, starring Johnny Depp as the title role, with supporting actors Helena Bonham Carter (who I absolutely adore), Alan Rickman (Professor Snape to the young ones, Colonel Brandon in Sense and Sensibility to the young ladies), and Sacha Baron Cohen (also known as Borat). They all sing their own parts, and although Johnny Depp isnt exactly a broadway performer, I thought he did quite a good job. If you go to my profile and click on my myspace, i have a song that he sings as my profile song. All the actors did a great job. I cried at the end. I approached it as a love story, that is all I will say. It's to be expected with me, being such a romantic and all. The sound track is great. It is rated R for violence, and though the whole blood spurting thing is there, it is highly stylized. It's not like people being blown up by bombs, it obviously adds to the story.

So I recommend it. and I leave you with the opinion that Johnny Depp is smoking hot, even as a whacked out barber.

Oh, note to Cpt. Sparrow fans...the eyeliner has returned. Enjoy, loves.

Also, having now bought a few of the songs, I have decided that despite my general hate of Broadway, I would absolutely LOVE to play Mrs. Lovett in a stage production. Her character is so...creepy, but...real. So real. And her music, her vocal part, is so...weird. The harmonies in such songs as My Friends are absolutely wonderful.


So again, it is Christmas. Nothing is open, and being a Jew, I just sit around. Today I'm working on my application to Deerfield. It's really exciting this whole application. It's due on January 15th, so I am almost done with it, after that I am pretty much free to do what i want (any old time). I mean, obviously i want to end the year with all As, but I can just sort of...relax a bit, you know? I've been under so much stress lately with this whole application thing. To have it off my'll be grand.

So here I am, sitting blogging in my Pajamas drinking a cafe au lait thanks to my mum. I've been feeling more and more like I did over the summer, how I want to just fastforward to where I go to college and start to have my own life. Or at least until I get a car. The whole...freedom thing. I guess it's because i am feeling over protected these days. For example, my mum doesn't want me to see Sweeney Todd because she thinks it's too violent. Violence. It's what I've grown up with, Im used to it, it hardly fazes me. Plus, with Sweeney Todd, I honestly think it will be artistic blood use, seeing as it is Tim Burton. Stylized?

OK, so to add to the list of what I am doing, I am now listening to Christmas music. I do love Christmas. I mean, sure, I don't believe in the whole story, but the commercial element. I wonder if I would have liked to be raised with Christmas. But I don't think so. I mean yeah, it's great but it seems like much more of a burden than Hannukah. I'll just continue to enjoy it from the outside. Which is good enough for me.

Happy Christmas to all who celebrate it.

December 18, 2007

Bloody Contrast.

Wow. I had the two most different days in today and yesterday. Yesterday, It was cold, which was good, but I didnt wear a jacket, because i didnt think it would be THAT cold, so my arms were freezing. Then my earring fell out, and i was all bummed because they are my favorite earrings and it just sucked. I was so sure I would never find them. Then, I got dirt all over me at fields, then I felt like I failed an American History test, then I had to write an essay in Dr. Dean's class. So I went home and I hurt my hands piping chocolate ganache onto cakes for my teachers. I did get a 110 on my Math project, but I kind of excpected it so...

Then today, I found my earring and helped my friend understand translating and transcribing DNA in Science class, I think I did really well on my French midterm part 1, I sang beautifully in Orchestra, I did well on the review for my Math Midterm, then I had fun at fields, then I got a 92 on my History test and an 80 on my Grammar test! Which is surprising because the past two grammar tests I got a 73 and a then I came home and had a great recording session for my Brahms Sonata to send to Deerfield for my application, and it was all good.

I wonder if I would like good days as much if they were every day. You know what they say, not having something makes it all the better when you do have it. Or whatever. I guess that's how it is. Even though it would be damn nice if every day were like today was.

Oh, but wanna hear the list of things on my mind?

Application to Deerfield, which entails
Music Recordings
Application Essay
Keeping grades up
Teacher Recommendations
Hoping that my SSAT scores are high enough
Getting everything done and ready to turn in by January 15th.
Keeping friends in order (not that that takes much. Just your usual 8th grade BS)
Maintaining a Social life (or being in denial about having one)
Keeping peace with my parents (see above parentheses)
Eating healthy (aka not falling into the Holiday Calory Fest, which I am already guilty of)
Cousins coming into town (so not really something to worry about, but its on my mind)
Oh, and maintaning my sanity would be good. Despite my recent emotional break down.

So despite all this, I am still pretty happy a lot of the time. There is this one kind of annoyingly vicious cycle where I get kind of bitchy when im stressed, then my friends get mad at me, then I make excuses, then they get more mad at me, then I get mad at them for not cutting me slack and it ends up snowballing into a big ball of viciousness. But then days like today come a long and its all good.

As is my usualy, I leave you with..well not a quote, but a movie. That has had me laughing for a good amount of time now. About 2 weeks.


December 12, 2007

The terms that I hate. Part I.

So in my dealing with people, in my conversations, in my readings, I have come across things I really can't stand. Terms and words and phrases and punctuation marks. I give you now a beginning of a list of terms i hate. Part 1.

-Semicolons. I know this one is used a lot, but they really bug me. Just...annoying. The weird bit is that I use them a lot. I mean a looot. I quote Kurt Vonnegut:

"If you really want to hurt your parents, and you don’t have the nerve to be a homosexual, the least you can do is go into the arts. But do not use semicolons. They are transvestite hermaphrodites, standing for absolutely nothing. All they do is show you’ve been to college."

-Complexes and Disorders: In all my talkings with Dan, I have realized that i dont really like the whole classifying people into different disorders. I mean, disease I can understand, but with the mind, how can you get so specific that you can group two minds together into one group? Isn't the mind so individual (unless you've been brainwashed by aliens, of course) that it should be nye impossible to group them together under one basic label.

-the word Analyze: It's so useful, which is annoying, but it seem so objective and impersonal.

-The words mature and immature: Again, useful at times, but it is hard to be clear about whether you mean it to have positive or negative connotations.

-Backpacks: another very very useful thing, but they bug me because they make my dresses ride up when I wear them.

-The spelling of weird. "I before E except after C", right? WRONG.

SO that concludes my list of terms that I hate part 1, and here is another quote that i love...

"I believe in everything until it's disproved. So I believe in fairies, the myths, dragons. It all exists, even if it's in your mind. Who's to say that dreams and nightmares aren't as real as the here and now? "
--John Lennon

December 09, 2007

Nobody Knows Me.

It's true, and it sucks. Not to get all emo on you, but I am such a drama queen that I always tend to put on a different face at school, a different one at opera, a different one with family, etc. It's not that i have been covering u myself, its more like...i accentuate different facets of my personality depending on the environment, you know? It's not a fake me, its just not the whole picture of me. So, my new goal is to always expose my whole self, all facets incorporated, etc.

Im worried that you dont understand what i mean by different faces. Do you take it as putting on a mask? Because that's not what it is, it really isn't. I can i put it better. It' say im this person, who has a hyper side, who has a quiet side, who has a cruel side and who has a kind side. In one envronment, i would be cruel, in one, quiet, in one kind, in one hyper, get it? It isnt different versions of me, its me but only part of me.

So since that is all cleared up, lets talk about finding who i am, as a whole. From what I have found (and bare in mind, i am as confused by all this as you are, unless you're Dan who studies my "mannerisms" so he probably has more insight than i do...depressing, eh?), I am this...quiet person. I know, right? Quiet? WHAT? Sarah! Nah. But really, i am sort of quiet, but i can be loud. Like, when im loud, im loud. Right? Get it? I hope so, but to tell the truth, if i were reading this and not writing, it, I probably wouldn't get it. Anyway, I can be cruel, but I really am quite compassionate. Again, this may be surprising to some of you, but whatever.

Now that I've figured this stuff out, my new goal is that I expose this person. So wish me luck, and here is a quote:

"Curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back."--proverbial

December 08, 2007

Ha, Right.

I have this terrible problem where i have this huge burst of energy to do something but then it dies down slowly and finally im just like...uh...nevermind. It happens with so many things. Homework, healthy eating, and writing movies. I can't write a movie. Not enough patience. I can act in them but i CANNOT write them. It's insane. I just..I hate what I write, it seems so cliched and just annoying. So yeah, for now the movie thing is off. Which is kind sad because it would have been loads of fun, but maybe we can just mess around with a camcorder and some free time.

Also, I have been having some sort of an emotional break down this week, its kind of weird, but i realized two seconds ago as i was typing that that I can look at myself and sort of think about it. I mean, obviously, its going to be biased, because its still me thinking, but i do get sort of an outside view. ITs as if somebody with the exact same morals and ideals is looking at me. Aaand that was kind of off topic, but whatever. It's like my dreams. I do that in my dreams. I sort of...I see my dream as a movie but then there are two mes, the one in the movie and the one watching the movie so i have two separate trains of thought running at the same time. Its pretty wild.

Do you ever have different dreams in the same location, and tha location is one that might not exist, or that you have never been to before? That happened to me, it was this HUGE mall, and i had a dream about it about a year ago, and then another like two nights ago. the plots were different, so its not like it was a rerun. Ha. Plots, reruns. Yeah, I refer to my dreams as TV shows.

Where' the clicker for my eyelids?

Ok, I cant end an entry with that sentence, it's way too lame. I do that a lot. Oh, I know what I can talk about. So it bugs me when people are like, "Oh, I'm so crazy, I'm seriously going insane" and I am totally guilty of this, but the thing is, crazy people dont know they're crazy, so how can you say you are going crazy and really be going crazy? Also, its like, crazy as opposed to what? Normal? What;s normal? ISn't everybody a little bit of crazy?

And I can't think of a nice witty thing to end with so i will end with these quotes:

We do not have to visit a madhouse to find disordered minds; our planet is the mental institution of the universe.

No excellent soul is exempt from a mixture of madness.

December 04, 2007



Chag Sameach.

You know, last night I tried to count the ways of spelling Chanukah.


lol at the last two.

Damn, I have no life.

Anyway, all you Jews out there (or have a good Holiday. Even though it technically hasn't started yet..

AS OF TONIGHT, have a good Holiday.

December 03, 2007

Making of a Movie, Part 1

So If you read my last post, you will know that I have been considering making a movie. Well, now I intend to put my plan into action. I am working on the script right now. I have probably gone through like 4 different beginnings, but I couldn't quite get it down. I am posting the script as we go along on my sister blog, so check it out if you want. Anywaaaay. So I want to sort of document how it is to make a movie as a teenager. Who doesn't have loads of money. I am very much looking forward to it, but there are some things I wonder about, like whether or not I could get away with filming stuff in stores downtown. And the whole writers block thing...ugh. But I am slowly making my way there. Another thing is, I will be working on it at school and people will be like, oh, I wanna be in it and im like uh, we aren't that close, and Im trying to keep it small. Maybe I can write another character in. It is tought to be honest. But I obviously can't lie about something like that, it just wouldn't work. So anyway, whoever is reading, stay tuned for more!

And now, for a regular blog blurb:

Im still feeling lost. The writing is good though becuse it allows me to sort of get away in my own way. And it will be something to put on my resume.

That is all.

December 02, 2007

I have had a brilliant idea.

I want to make a movie. With my friends. How much fun would that be? I was thinking about my friends...we have a writer, a few actors, an editor, a location person, a director, a camera person. I mean, what else do you need? I dunno how long it would take. I assume that if I kept people going, not that long.

I can't think of ideas to start writing, because I would love to write it, with help from out resident author, Jen. I have editing stuff on my computer, my Mac. We could film some at school, some at peoples' houses, some around town. Just for fun. It would be something I coud add to my resume, lol! I think it would be fun, but I dont know how my friends will react. And I would have to convince my dad to get a camcorder. But we could make it work. Anyway, wish me luck.

November 24, 2007


I have this feeling like Im inside a cage. But not a cage. Like, im trapped but not in a cage. Or rather, the whole world is a cage. I feel like there is something knawing at my side and no matter where I go, I will not be able to escape it, not the mall, not Barnes and Noble, not Paris, not even Massachusetts. I have no idea what this monster is but it is new to me, and i intend to wallow in it so that i can sunddenly trap it and find out what it is.


I have realized a few thing...

1. Flames are absolutely entrancing; you could stare at them for hours.
2. Semicolons are totally useless. ugh.
3. the moon on a clear night is also amazingly entrancing.
4. Acting is what I want to do for the rest of my life and it scares the hell out of me.
5. If I dont succeed at something, I sometimes end up rivaling against myself to win at the second try, to prove to myself that i can do better. But only sometimes. Never with the important stuff.
6. I have really twisted ideas of how to make people think what I want them to think, and it is a 50/50 chance of working or not.
7. number 6 made no sense at all.
8. I really love doing geometric constructions.
9. I want to do an art photoshoot. Wouldn't that be fun?
10. I have no other realizations.
11. JUST KIDDING! I can't stand when people spend their whole day on myspace posting stupid bulletins.

Ok that's really it.

11/21-11/23 2007

I havent been keeping up with things. I feel bad. So now, I am going to give you a day by day account of what has happened since wednesday.

So Wednesday morning, I got up and started getting ready for my party that night. It was rather uneventful. I fought with the parental units about music practice, as usual. I cleaned. I did get my brows waxed that morning (ouchy). then I baked a cake. Jen showed up early, and Dan showed up earlier. So we were just sitting around, right, and I was decorating the cake. I started to run out of time, so I couldn't finish decorating so I left it to my mom while I did makeup and got dressed. I wore a tres cute tights, red silk dress, black wedg-ishes, a silver lacey belt.

That isnt that great a pic, but whatever, gives you and idea. So the party was great. Mostly. I had a weird time in the middle somewhere where I kind of freaked out about moving. Honestly, I started crying, and sort of...well not having a fit, but I couldnt breathe calmly and it was just really intense. Nobody saw though. After that i guess I kind of got it all out of my system and was a lot more in that dancing high party mode. It was good. So anyway, we had cake, everybody loved it, and Kira was taking all these pictures. It was pretty good. It was a formal ish party, so we had steak, pasta, and salad at a nice table with table cloths and realy plates and silverwear and candles and roses and everything. It was really nice. Then everybody went home and I went to sleep.

The next day, Thursday, I didnt do much. Watched Lord of the Rings 1, which was a present (well, the trilogy). Worked on projects. Practiced. OH YEAH! Thursday was Thanksgiving! So I went to this dinner, where I didnt REALLY know the people there...but the food was good and I got to watch Bourne Supremacy, even though I hadnt seen Bourne Identity. But whatever.

Yesterday, I woke up kind of late...watched the episode of Grey's Anatomy I had missed the night before, worked on some projects, and then i cleaned out my bathroom. Rather, my mom cleaned out my bathroom, and i told her what to throw away and what not to. But it had a really crazy effect. I am now hving a sort of emotional break down about moving. Its so crazy, I mean, I have all these friends and connections... and I am sure it is the right thing to do, but it is so daunting. Then I watched both Lord of the Rings 2 and 3. I cried at the end of 3, I always do..But this time I kept crying. I am going craaazy!! I need to do something calming. I dunno waht though. and of course, my parents wont take me seriously. I try to tell them about these kinds of things, and they are great and help me when I have a fever, or when I am throwing up, but when I say I need some kind of mental health day, they just...its like they dont know what it is. But whatever. We will see if the weekend goes better.

So now, I will leave you witht the question of the century. Its complicated, so pay attention. You are going to move at the end of the year. You love this one person, lets call the person Person X. You are kind of sure they like you back. So you have two choices: Tell Person X you love him or her, or don't. If you do tell Person X, he or she will either admit to their affection for you, or reject you and leave you broken hearted and confused. If you dont tell him or her, you will always live wondering if something could have happened there. What do you do?

BTW, this is not a current situation of mine, it is a past one.

Dearie me.

November 19, 2007


So. I am now 14! It took a while for me to get a blog down on it but anyway, here it is..

So I will go over my weekend. I woke up and my Dad made me bacon and jelly omelettes (emelettes with jelly--yeah it sounds gross but it is actually really good), and while we ate it we listened to The Best of Cream. It was kind of hilarious. Anyway since then I have been kind of obsessed with Cream, and like..listening a lot. OH and the stuff my parents got for me! My mom was out of town, but she left stuff with dad to give to me. Mum gave me some Betsey Johnson earrings and dad gave me a portable water color set, it is so cute! So moving right along, my Grandfather then picked me up and we went shopping. I was looking for a new dress, and Doc (my grandpa) found one that I totaly love, red silk. Tres gorgeous. We also went to Mac (makeup) and I got a makepver, and it was sort of intense, but I ended up buying the lipstick and the eyeshadow and the lip liner. Then on the way out I got some perfume. It was so much fun, trying to find a dress with Doc and just having fun and stuff. Really good times. So then i went home for about an hour and got ready for Katie's party. There I did this Ouija Board thing, it was really wild. Strange, strange feeling. I think there is some validity in it all, I mena, it answered questions that nobody else on the marker moved. The party was fun, that was basically all I did.

Then on Sunday, I practiced music and stuff, and Dad and I went out to lunch at Mel's DIner, which is a really cute little place. We went home ad I baked cupcakes for my Drama class and for mum. I hardly got a chance to frost them! Then I went to my dad's art class and sat around doing nothing. It was pretty fun. Well, I did talk to my friends on the phone, finished homework, and started The Big Lebowski (which is an awesome movie, btw, go rent it). I also ate a whole sleeve of ritz crackers, it was terrible. After the art class we went home and I finished frosting the cupcakes, and then we went to pick mom up from the air port. I ended up getting to bed at like..midnight and waking up at like 7:30, and then falling asleep again until 10 of 8.

Today was pretty good. Its kid of relaxed these days since tomorrow is essentially Friday because of Thanksgiving. We watched a video on the Donner party today in History. It was really crazy. Would you eat your friends if you were really depsperate? Jen was asking that ALL DAY. I would not be able to bring myself to kill my friend, but if she died naturally, and I were REALLY desperate, I would probably eat. But cancel cancel, seriously! That would be so miserable, I would definitely be scarred for life.

November 16, 2007

Middle School Dance 1, '07

Oh my GOD! I just got back from the dance, which was so amazing!

So now that we are at the top of the pack, the eighth grade, we can do whatever the hell we want. we dont have to try to be cool to get in with the eighth graders, or's amazing. Like, so much fun! I was thinking I wouldn't go, but with my party animal friends, it was totally amazing. Morgan and Jen taught me to pop lock and drop it but apparently im not that good at it because I am too graceful, like a ballerina.

I requested Material Girl and Blister in the Sun, but they didnt play them.

So what else..that's all I remember.

All my love to whoever's reading, and remember to be happy tomorrow because IT'S MAH BIRFDAY!!!! THAT's RIGHT!


November 11, 2007

Cleaning the Closet.

That is the task I have been working on for quite a long time. Its tough. Lots of nostalgea. Lots of throwing things away. Lots of little critters that have been hiding. Actually, there has been a surprising deficiency of little critters, thank God. I went through my dress up box. I looked at all my beanie babies. Its so intense doing all this. Im almost done, and then I get to study for bio! WHOO! But I have a bit more tidying to do. CLoset is looking great. I made a playlist to listen to while ceaning or exercising. Lots of upbeat songs. Material Girl is on it. I was in all these dress ups I found dancing to Material Girl. It was amazing. Maybe it burned off the three donuts I had today. Ha. And my skin is clearing up which is awesome! But anyway, I am so tired after last night's party. I kep worrying that my nose is broken, but I think it would be hurting a LOT more if it were broken. I read about this woman who just found out last year that she had broken her nose in 2002. That was creepy. I was like, crap. And my whole body aches from falling so much. It was all totally worth it though.

November 10, 2007

What a day...

So it all started when I woke up at like 6:30 in the morning to take the SSAT to get into Deerfield Academy next year, and it was really intense. I had a dream that there would be five people there and guess what...THERE WERE 5 PEOPLE THERE. WOOOOH. So the test seemed pretty easy. We'll see when we get scores back. I'm pretty sure I did well. So that was like 9-12 ish. Dan was there..he ended up running into his old friend from St. Stephens, so they were all like Woo! and then we went out to lunch, Dan, his friend, his mom, my mom and me. First Watch. It was fun. We ended up leaving the mothers talking and going to Publix and wheeling Dan's friend around in a wheel chair because he "stubbed his toe". It was amazing. So then I was really tired. I went home and I ended up having to shave my legs because I had a pool party that night, so I was bummed. So I shaved my legs.

Then the party.

The wonderful AMAZING party.

It was a pool party, and Im not gonna say whose it was just in case people are like meh i wasnt invited, which would be stupid anyway but WHATEVER. Anyway. It was a salt-chlorine pool, so when I got out it was all screwy with my just shaved legs. It stung like hell. But it was so much fun in the pool...there was this big like floating matress...and me andi and Adrienne all got on it...and we couldnt stay on and it was fuun. FINALLY Jen showed up with Morgan, who crashed, and then Federico showed up eventually too. So it was basically me, Fed, Jen, Morgan, Adrienne and Andi the whole time. It was way fun. So we ate and played this game and then we all went out to the trampoline.

The trampoline.

So we were on the trampoline and so insane..we were like buzzed on life. There was no drinking or drugs, I assure you, but we were all acting totally insane. It was amazing. So all this stuff went down...One was when three of us were lying next to each other and FEDERICO JUMPED OVER US!! His elbow hit my nose, and it hurt like HELL. It is so bruised. It hurts to itch it. Gah. Its gonna be a balloon tomorrow. So then we were jumping around and like pretending to do these like tribal crazy cannibal was great. Fed went crazy. CRAY ZEE. He was like dancing around with his shirt over his face and was so funny. He kept trying to do flips but it didnt work...and all of this felt like so trippy because it was on a trampoline so the whole world was spinning was awesome. So we were just like so crazy..and then Jen had to go home. It was tres sad. But then it was Fed, me, and Adrienne and Andi, and so it was still fun, but we missed Jen. We were still crazy. So then me and Adrienne went home with Katie and Alexis.

OH and there was this one time where I had to get back into the house, and the door to the screen porch was locked, so I was begging Luke to let me in because he was playing ping pong, and I was all like Let a woolf in! and Katie was like, who would let in a wolf..and I was like LET A VERY VERY NICE WOOLF IN!!!

Man, it was just so amazing...I am so crazed right now. Exhausted. I had such a huge day. It feels like the weekend is over..and I have homework, a test to study for, History questions to do, AND a monologue for acting. Whoopee. AND to top it all off, my mom is leaving for a week tomorrow. She's going to miss my birthday. It makes me really sad, but I'll ne OK. I'm gonna miss her.

So that was my day...yeah.

November 08, 2007

I feel bad.

I havent blogged in a while. But after this Saturday, I will be back at it. I have this big board test on Saturday to get into Deerfield next year. Tres exciting. Anyway, life is pretty good in general. I am having kinda crazy bouts of bi polar ness. Like, happy sad happy sad happysadhappysadhappysad you get it. Grey's Anatomy is tonight, and I have to finish work before I watch, so I really cant write anymore. But I will leave you with a tres cute story..

This past Saturday, I took a walk in my neighborhood, starting around 8:15 and ending around 10:30. I went up to my bus stop and then over to Barnes and Noble when it opened for coffee. It was so much fun...out of the 14 people I saw, 7 said hello, 3 nodded, and 4 didn't acknowledge me at all, despite walking a foot away from me. Strange, eh?

I'm reading A Separate Peace...everybody hates it I think, but I actually really like it. Gasp! No surprise though, I loved Lord of the Flies, and everybody last year didnt like it...whatever. I am the girl-who-reads-Jane-Austen.

November 02, 2007

Halloween Pics...

Sorry about the turning the head thing...that was what I wore to school.


Then later that night as Elizabeth Bennet...The actual costume I took off too quickly that night, so here is the unfinal product and the hairstyle. Again sorry about the turning..

It was a fun day. The Twiggy Costume was SO much fun to wear...It has given me a great love of the and fashion. And of course music..What a fun time! It felt like everybody just did what they wanted. Except for that nasty little war we fought over in Vietnam. Well, every age has its drawbacks, eh?

October 27, 2007

Painting, I Ching, and Sanskrit.

I am really getting into Indian and Hindu culture and religion. So today, I was bored, so I drew on my white board an ohm symbol surrounded by a lotus, and then I wrote the Hare Krishna mantra in english on top and in sanskrit on the bottom. It was very interesting writing in a language I dont know. I sort of got to know some of the symbols and what they sounded like..mum came in and was all, how does that affect your Judaism and I thought about it. My approach is that all monotheistic religions (and Hindu because it is basically one God with many manifestations) have the same deity, whether they call it Allah, Adonai, God, Krishna, whatever! Anyway, it is all the same thing, just different approaches to the rituals and concepts surronding that God. So I really take it as being religiously diverse, I suppose. I embrace asoects of other religions and sort of adopt them into the mosh pit that is my religion. Dont even get me started on all the details. So I had this awesome picture on my whiteboard and I was like, hey, this is a whiteboard. It will be erased someday. So, I got out my paints, and painted it, with a few minor changes in color and medium. I had so much fun that I also made a painting as a tribute to John Lennon, and another one where I wrote that E.E. Cumming poem, I carry your heart, on a piece of paper in thin sharpie and then I painted differen symbols for love from different parts of the world. I have a western symbol, and African symbol, the chinese symbol, and an ancient Egyptian symbol I just threw in there. These are the symbols...

Western: I did a simple heart.

African: this weird moon and star thing, but not like the Islamic one...It's called an Osram Ne Nsorama..

The Chinese symbol: just google image chinese love symbol..

and the Egyptian symbol is a triangle. Triangles were apparently thought to symbolize knowledge and capacity, the capacity to learn and to love and to feel etc. So it's not directly a love symbol, but it is sort of.

I think my favorite is the ohm. The lennon thing is cool, and the love thing is...meh. It;s ok. whatever. A good idea, but didnt totally work the way I planned it.

Then my dad taught be how to do I Ching, which is this crazy cool fortune-telling type tap-into-the-chi-around-you-and-let-it-guide-you-in-making-the-right-decision thing. You throw coins and different patterns tell you what kind of line to make, and once you have six lines drawn, you go back to the book and look up the number of the line pattern and then you see what it all says. Tres cool. I was too tired to do it tonight.

I look forward to tomorrow, a day of baking cupcakes, carving punpkins, and studying for SSAT.

Aaaah, geek-hood...

So I am most definitely a geek for a number of reasons. The only one necessary for this post is that I am totally in love with the Lord of the Rings books. I mentioned in a post a while ago that the composer of the opera we are doing at the end of the year (The Hobbit) is a totally awesome geek, adn that he looked up the elven-tongue language to write some songs from the opera in it. So I, being me, did some research and I found the name of the language is Sindarin. It is the language that the elves adopted when they came to middle earth. Before that, they spoke quenya, which in their opinion is more beautiful. Anywho, I was looking for pictures of the runes that sindarin is written with, and I found this picture...

I said to myself, if I thought I was a geek, I was nowhere near where these peopel are. This is apparently a picture from The woman is teaching these people how to speak sindarin.

"Pedich i lam edhellen? I eneth nin Riwen Craban Rovan-Hu."
which means...
Do you speak Elvish? My name is Crowned Maiden Raven Wild Dog."

Ok so, what I did was Sarah means princess right? So there you go, crowned maiden. Then my middle name means raven, and my last name came originally from wolfovitch, so I just took wolf and i couldnt find wolf so I made it wild dog.

Man, I think I have too much free time on my hands, or something..


I have decided that I should have some consistant theme to my blog...not like a theme like ht mustache blog from my last post, but maybe how to survive life in general, and i could throw in tips randomly at how to survive I come across things in life I will help my audience (if i is in existance) understand how to get through it too..

Or I could just start posting lots of pictured of men's facial hair in the 1800s...

so its not the 1800s but its cool.

October 26, 2007


So I dont know how much you look at, but it is such a cool site...try it, they update on Sunday mornings. That and I found this blog about mustaches in the 19th century.. Very entertaining.

I wish I had the energy to start a blog about something meaningful. Instead of just my life. Not like anybody reads it anyway. Except for my silently onlooking mother. Thanks, Ma! Anyway, I had this thought that maybe someday I would just start up an anonymous blog about I go about becoming an actress, or something like that. In the mustache blog it makes it sound like a constant adventure that somebody goes on to strive to discover more about the 19th centuty mustache. How cool! I feel sort of lame doing a blog that isnt important or anything. I mean, hardly anybody reads it, so why bother? I have like..over 80 entries, most of which have never been read, I suppose...but enough self pity.

I took a grammar test, a history test, and a geometry test today. Last night I was up until two because I couldn't sleep. Just staring at the ceiling, you know? It suuucked. And Im kind of angry at the world right now. I hate myself for it, I feel lik such a coldhearted bitch.

I have been thinking lately about how I will work my way into the social ladder at my new school next year. Who will I try to make friends with? Who will I avoid? Will there be any love at first sight? Sorry, had to throw it in there...

I have had this weird feeling that I want to strangle everybody in sight. I think it's called PMS. I was weird today. Tres bipolar and mood swing-y. But Opera was great! I met the composer of the piece we are peforming at the end of the year, Dean Burry, he is soo COOL! He is like..such a geek, and I mean that in the absolute best sense of the term. The music is incredible, all weird and dissonant, and crazy..but still totally gorgeous and magical, which of course it should be since it is an opera of The Hobbit by Tolkien..But he wrote a song in the opera in ELVISH! OR ELVEN or Elvish tonge or whatever it is called. It has a name, I dont remember it though. I am so excited about the whole thing, I can hardly contain myself.


October 20, 2007

Pros and Cons of 10-20-07

1. I ate too much sugar and not enough healthy food.
2. I ran the money on my debit card down.
3. I found out my ex friend gave me a blank gift card. Cruel.
4. I shopped for a cross pendant! (they werent for me, with a friend for a different friend)
5. I found out I cant have a Halloween party..
6. My iPod wont load songs that I have in iTunes and I dont know why.
7. I had to do prep for the SSAT.
8. I killed my hand doing exercises on the cello.
9. Turns out I dont fit into the size of dress at Macys that I thought I would fit into (sigh).
10. My mom wont let me bake tomorrow.
11. My dad stopped me from watching Star Wars Episode III so that he could watch the Baseball game. I mean, he never watches baseball, but I guess there is some sentimental connection since it was the Red Sox and all.

1. I bought two new shirts and a necklace.
2. Despite eating too much sugar, the sugar was in the form of delicious middle eastern pastries with cashews in them.
3. Even though I didnt fit into them, the dresses I tried on were all truly heinous, so it doesnt matter.
4. I approached life with my new seize-any-opportunity-that-comes-your-way-and-live-impulsively-within-reason thing. That's why I was trying on ugly dresses that I wouldnt buy anyway at Macy's.
5. I rocked out to Oh Darling! in the car with my mom.
6. I got to eat falafel and greek salad from Sahara!
7. I watched Sixteen Candles. What an awesome movie!
8. I got clear on something that I needed to know for the SSAT and am now quite confident about it.
9. I got to go to the mall. Which actually wasnt so great, a tad bit disappointing, but I did get stuff on sale, so thats always good.
10. My mom likes what I got.
11. I cleaned my room. Always makes me feel important to walk into a clean room...
12. I made some little decoration things...little black cut out rats that I will put on the walls and wait to see what my parents say..
13. I got to watch Bridget Jones' Diary too, which always makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside.
14. I got girl talk time with Melody when we went shopping at the mall. Tres fun.

So today was a good day.

Soul Mate


OK. This whole post might sound like a cliche. Anyway, I was thinking last night about my dream guy, you know to get to sleep, and I had this immense happiness at the thought, but I also felt empty somehow. Then, for just a moment, I felt like I was...whole again. God, this sounds so..made-for-TV-movie. Whatever. Anyway, it was this strange feeling that I was in touch somehow with whoever my soul mate..(AUGH THIS IS GETTING GROSS). But you guys get it. Right? It was really weird. DO you believe in soul mates?

Wouldn;t it be funny if your soul mate was like..some person who would totally not be fit for you according to today's social standards? Like, they are in their 80s and you are in your

October 19, 2007

Holy crap

the funniest thing just happened. OK, so Dan was like, here is a quote I like:

"The stupid man talks about people. The Average man talks about events. The Intelligent man talks about Ideas."

SO I was like

"The Woman can talk about all three and still command respect"

SO he said that he saw it as...

"The stupid man says 'That person is a loser.' The Average Man says 'Did you hear what that person said?' And the Intelligent person says 'Why would that person do that?'"

So then I came back with "that is exactly how my rants go! For example...

"Ugh, that girls is such a bitch. I can't believe she said what she said...I mean really, why would she say something like that?!"

*basks in own brilliance*

So I am going to interview myself.

Name: Sarah
Dream Profession: Film or TV actress
Describe yourself in one word: Indescribable
Three material things you like: Roses, Cake, Music (is that considered material?)
Three things (anythings) that you hate: Ignorance, rap, arugula.
What do you think is the meaning of life: I think that the meaning of life is to create as much peaceful good joy in the world (as opposed to sadistic joy).
Who are your heros: Seriously? Be prepared. OK. God, Queen Elizabeth I, John Lennon, Tim Gunn, Jon Stewart, Dr. Dean, The great grandmother I never knew (baby when she died. She sounds like she was an incredible grandmother, the kind I want to be, plus the whole jewish grandmother bit that I will play), Ingrid Michaelson, Mozart, Beethoven, Puccini. To name a few.
Favorite Music Genre: Musi of the Indie/Alternative persuasion...
Current Favorite Quote: I don't think I've ever had a toilet orange..."-Dr. Dean

October 16, 2007


Halloween is the most awesomest holiday. I mean, seriously. What other holiday can you get dressed up, look like a fool, act like a fool, eat lots of candy, and be able to get away with it? For somebody who loves to play different roles, Halloween is heaven. I was talking about me. So the one thing I hate is living in Florida, because Halloween is HOT! Like, Temperature!! Stupid. I bought the Halloween issue of Martha Stewart Living. I am such a Martha Hoor. I love all her stuff at Michael's... Halloween also brings on "the Holidays," which is always good.

I heard somewhere that lots of suicides take place during the Holidays. I think that would be because they are under so much pressure from having to entertain their families. I know for some people, just BEING around their families is insanely trying. I love my family. I mean, yeah, there are a few who get on my nerves, but I bet there are a few on whose nerves I get on. Yeah. So if I were going to choose a time to commit suicide, it probably wouldn't be during the Holidays. I mean, how distasteful! Here you are, your whole family is there, and what would be more scandalous and embarassing! I guess if I were suicidally depressed I wouldnt really give a damn...but still. That would put a damper on things, no? AND, I am pretty sure committing suicide is like...extremely bad with regard to Karma. Unless you dont believe in that kind of thing. WHich you might not if you are suicidal. Most of the people I know who believe in Karma are pretty happy people. That is probably why they believe in Karma! Like, a cycle. If you are happy, you are like, oh, it's because of Karma! and If you believe in Karma, you will always try to do good things, which will make you happy. Get it? (now you say "got it" and then I say..) Good. Haha, you will totally be like wtf when you read that if you haven't seen the Court Jester. Anyway, I would probably commit suicide when I was bored. If I did commit suicide. Which really isnt something I am considering.

I read this thing the other day and it was about what a friend is at different stages of your life. It mademe think about all the friends I am leaving by moving. I am so ready to move though. I am just...I dont know. Sick of Florida. I guess you could say I am bored, but I wouldnt put it that way. It seems a bit crude. I am taking the SSAT in a few weeks. It seems really easy, but I am still a little worried.

OH OH OH I am putting up Halloween decorations this weekend..and have I mentioned that I am an amazing baker and decorater of cakes?

October 09, 2007


The other night, I felt this sudden, terrible feel of is a selfish fear, I kow, but I was scared that all of thee things I have planned for myself, all these things I want to do, places I want to see, and people I want to meet...I wouldnt be able to do, see or meet them. I am ambitious, I do expect a lot from myself, and I am strong willed, but I am scared, as well. I mustn't let this fear get in my way, though. I am doing great in acting, I am hopeful for the future, I have faith in myself.

I think what mya have brought it on was watching a DVD of the memorial concert for George Harrison, Concert for George. The whole thing is so is all of his friends and son performing different music he wrote. Some people who took part in it are his son, Dhani, his fellow Beatles, Paul McCartney and Ringo Starr, Eric Clapton, Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers, Ravi Shankar and his daughter, and so on. Here is the end, including some final words from Dhani and Paul. Note: Olivia was Geroge's wife.

It made me cry the other night.

October 07, 2007

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

"Everything in this room is eatable. Even I'm eatable! But that is called cannibalism, my dear children, and is in fact frowned upon in most societies."

I love that movie. I think I like the old one better than the new one, less creepy, but the new one is great as itself, as opposed to a movie based on a book, and Johnny Depp is a great actor, so who could complain, right?

October 06, 2007

Top Shop.

Go ahead. Explore a bit. I swear to God, when I am a rich and famous actress, I will seriously do all my shopping there. Well, not all, but a lot.

Have I mentioned..

how divinely happy I am? I feel as if a weight of bricks has been lifted from my shoulders...I haven;t been actually carefree and happy in...almost a year? It's wonderful. Wonderful.

Except right now I am exhausted and have a killer headache. Ah, life..

October 04, 2007

Please, accept...

my apology for saying pwnage (crap, I said it again) in my previous entry. It just...came out.

Again, please accept my most heartfelt apology. Is that the right usage? Either way..


Sarah is so amazing, so she decided to take a crossword puzzle about the constitution and fill it with the word pirate or pirates or pirate! or pirates! Isn't that amazing? I think so...

I know it's hard to see and it's backwards and all, but try, try to see it. Haha, look, there's my eye!!! Heehee...and my sucky manicure...OK, back to studying for bio and history. Woot!

I memorized ALL the presidents. In order. pwnage.

October 03, 2007


They need to hurry up and get here. And it is waaay too hot for October. Seriously.
I mean, I have all this fall stuff I want to wear, and can I? NOOOOOO because stupid Florida is stupid HOT.AAAAUGH!

October 01, 2007

Love Sucks.

I mean, really. There is this brilliant line in Moonstruck that says "Loretta, I love you. Not like they told you love is, and I didn't know this either, but love don't make things nice - it ruins everything. It breaks your heart. It makes things a mess. We aren't here to make things perfect. The snowflakes are perfect. The stars are perfect. Not us. Not us! We are here to ruin ourselves and to break our hearts and love the wrong people and *die*. The storybooks are *bullshit*. Now I want you to come upstairs with me and *get* in my bed!"

It explains it perfectly. Love sucks. I can really say no more. But let me tell you, falling out of love is hard to do.

September 29, 2007


Is good. I am happy, and that makes people around me happy, which makes them like sitting with me, which makes me happy, which creates this huge snowball of joy. Yay snowballs of joy! I baked more muffins. They are now...


They are whole wheat spice, with allspice and cinnamon and nutmeg. the batter is tasty, I dunno how the muffins themselves will turn out. Will post pics later. But yeah, they are confusion muffins. Because people are being confusing. It was really funny. So my grandma is staying with me while my parents are in France, and we were wondering where the word allspice came from, and apparently, allspice is supposed to smell like a mix of the spices cinnamon, cloves, and nutmeg. Interesting, huh? I'm sittint here and there are all these amazing smells wafting over from the oven...reminds me of fall. I think I have found my new recipe. We have been baking a lot today. My grandma's mother cooked and baked a lot, and she has this big recipe box, which my mom got. I have never really looked through it, but today, Grama madean apricot jello salad thing and it looks really good, the recipe was her mother's from said recipe box. If only it were in the low 60s outside, that would make all these smells so much more appropriate...

September 27, 2007

I need to go to bed but...

I'm happy. I am really happy. And Grey's Anatomy started, which makes me happy, but also makes me sad. But I am confused. I think I might be covering confusion with blond happiness. I dunno.

But I need sleep, and this I know. G'night.

September 23, 2007

Yom Kippur 2007

So this year was the first year I fasted. I didnt totally make it through. I had some cheddar bunnies, but that's it. However, as I was standing at Ne'ila, the conclusion service of the holiday, I had this weird feeling of this energy coursing through my veins. It was insane because I was standing there (you stand for the whole service of ne'ila) and I felt like I would either pass out or throw up from my head ache, and then there was this energy. It made me feel weak.
Weaker than I already was...Then I was reading this prayer and my mom leaned over to me and said that the poetic english translation only seemed right when it was fall, because it was talking about closing gates and a close to the year, and with fall being the season that Yom Kippur usually falls in it all felt right with the days getting shorter and the colors and everything. Now I will announce that I am moving next year to Massachusetts. It will be hard, but it is the right thing for our family to do now. All my friends--I will miss you all, and I will come back and visit. Anyway, in past years, that poem-prayer thing never really affected me, but no I really started to miss fall. I mean, maybe you dont miss it when you know you can;t have it, but once you know that youw could, or that you will have it, just not this year, you miss it so much. That's what happened. I felt so sad, I started to tear up. Then we read Avinu Malkenu, and I just wanted to cry...It was amazing. I really felt more connected to God than I ever have in the past. I felt all this renewed trust and faith in God. It was amazing. Mom said that I got out of the High Holidays what everybody wants to get but doesn't necessarily.

So yay.

September 16, 2007

More emotion muffins

I am turning into Izzie Stevens. I lie on the floor when I'm depressed and I bake muffins...4 dozen was my total count today. This weekend was 5 dozen plus a batch of cookies and some really gross brownies.

those were the only good ones. ^^^

The vanilla is the best. So I am now officially a muffin and cookie and sometimes bread person.

September 14, 2007


So my English teacher assigned us to projects.
1. Write a poem about an inanimate object small enough to fit in your closed hand.
2. Write a poem inspired by another poem.

I have taken this to heart. I have decided that throughout the year, I will write poetry and put in cool fonts and colors and everythig and then at the end of the year I will bind it all..

So yay for Sarah.

September 12, 2007

What a day...

I woke up and fell asleep for another 20 minutes. Then I took a shower and used conditioner before shampoo. Then, I tried to put on make up and I forgot my moisturizer. Then I could get my eyeliner on right. I got dressed, which went fine, but then I had to make my lunch. Peanut butter and jelly sandwich. I practically failed. It was terrible. Then I went to school. I almost went the wrong direction to my locker, and then it took me a few seconds to get to my locker. Then I tried to get a book out of my locker while holding to other notebooks in each hand. In Biology, I almost used the coarse focus when I was on high power. In french class, I forgot to tear off the little edge thing on my quiz paper. In Orchestra, I couldn't figure out how to use the copy machine. In math, I forgot what perpendicular meant. At Lunch...whatever. Stuff went down. In US History...nothing happened. In English...right. I went a little nuts and started reading poetry out loud with really crazy voices to Caroline and decided to write my own poem about a grape.

Crazy day. Happy Rosh Hashanah...

But dinner was great. I have a stuffy nose from the challah. I am yearning for the holidays again, but they are on their way...It has begun with Rosh Hashanah. And no homework! I seriously came home with agenda. That's it. It was amazing.

My mind is going insane. I hate that, when you feel like you have no idea what you are thinking or how to control it. Wish me luck getting to sleep.

Love you all!

Another thing, if youa re reading this, I beg that you comment, just so that I know you are reading my entries. I have a terrible feeling that I am writing this for my own benefit, like a diary that somebody can look at if they want but they figure my life is too boring to bother. Not really. But yeah, just let me know that you are reading it. Like I said, I have a terrible feeling that nobody is reading this.

That is all.

September 03, 2007


I hate September. I mean, yeah, my best friend's birthday is in September, and there are a few really good looking movies coming out this September, but other than that, why is it here? I mean, we go back to school in August. And then it is hot and disgusting here in FL until late October! I think we should just skip September, and put Mel's b-day in like October, or December or something... It's almost half way over. Thank God.


I hate September. I mean, yeah, my best friend's birthday is in September, and there are a few really good looking movies coming out this September, but other than that, why is it here? I mean, we go back to school in August. And then it is hot and disgusting here in FL until late October! I think we should just skip September, and put Mel's b-day in like October, or December or something....

September 02, 2007

You know what I love?

Christmas. Christmas is one of my favorite holidays and I am not even Christian. I dont even bring in the customs like some people do. I just love Christmas. The holiday season is so amazing. That and fall are my two favorite times of the year. I love shopping around Christmas time. I love most Christmas music. Everybody is so forgiving and happy, and it is kind of sad, something about it is sad, too. Like..there is always that vibe that there are people outthere spending it alone (God, what a cliche...) and people who will commit suicide or something (Ok, not anymore, it's all good.). And then there are the movies. So many good movies. See what brought this on was I woke up listening to this song:

It Came Upon a Midnight Clear

That would make anybody long for and feel depressed about the Holidays.

Once, my Dad had to get surgery in the winter, so we all flew up to Massachusetts because the best doctor we could find was there. It was originally just to visit him and see how he was but he was all, like, Hey, I have Christmas open, want to have the surgery then? And my parents said yes, because it made a lot of sense. So for the four days that they went in, I stayed with my cousin Lizzy and my Aunt and Uncle. My Aunt's side of the family is Christian, and they (my cousin, aunt, and uncle) went up to celebrate Christmas with them. I was there, so they obviously dragged me with them. It was my first real Christmas experience, and it was a white Christmas. It was amazing. The family made me feel very at home. I had a whole stocking. It was really an amazing experience. And the snow! So beautiful.

We could get the same thing with Hannukah, but we don't. I think it is because we don't have any Jewish family around. And for the past few years, I have been in a Hebrew School that really isn't the right place for me. I never really felt right there, which may have been why some of the holiday stuff they did never really "did it" for me.

I really can't wait for the Holidays. For me, it is a whole string of happiness. I have my birthday in November, then Thanksgiving like a week later, then Hannukah, or Christmas, whichever comes first, and then New Year. Oh, and then there is Halloween a while before my birthday. So I guess from Halloween to the New Year and then the nice winter days in January and February and a little in March.

March always bugged me a little. I don't know why.

August 31, 2007


Does Magic exist? Not necessarily sparkly fire flying out of fingers magic, or wands and spells with latin roots. More like, inner strength and willpower. Or, an ability to read peoples' feelings, for example, if something is wrong with somebody you sense it (but hopefully have the tact to know whether or not to mention it..). Or it could be a sixth sense kind of situation, an ability to know that something is going to happen? Not being psychic...I cannot explain. Intuition, or instinct, but somehow more...I know not. Tell me, what say you, my dear friends?

I cam home today...

early from school because I felt sick. I hate tummy aches. They suck. So anyway, I have time to write because it is like 1:00 and all else I have to do is some homework and music practice. Now, the estion remains: What do I write about? This lack of subjects is very annoying. I mean, there is tons of stuff I could write about, but it is either too boring or too personal, or if I did disclose it on the internet, I would probably have people hunting me down at school to kill me.

Have you ever had just a random craving for some kind of food? OK, so recently, I have been completely obsessed with hummus. Like, I could just eat it with a spoon. Any kind, roasted red pepper, extra garlic, black olive, you name it! It's nice that it's hummus and not some other food that is terrible for you. Like cotton candy. Or chocolate chip cookies. Which reminds me, I am going over to Dan's house tomorrow and we are going to make chocolate chip cookies! Or, I am going to make the cookies in his kitchen while I try to explain my religion to him. But it's funny, I call it my religion, but it isnt really. Like, my religion is Judaism. My beliefs, on the other hand are kind of different. Of my own. Hey, I could write a blog about that!!!

August 26, 2007

Want some depressing literature?

Look no further than the wikipedia explanation of John Lennon's Death.

I was bored, OK?


Oh Man. So John Lennon is sort of my new obsession. Like, I absolutely adore him, he was so incredible, in many ways, in out-there ness and in Musicality. MUSICAL GENIUS. Really. Just listen to Across the Universe! I am a little bit obsessed now. Great, another one to add to the list. So basically, reading about John Lennon and his acts and can be a bit repulsive but only in the best sense of the term. Yeah, he did a lot of stuff that I consider stupid, but it was stuff that contributed to who he was and his whole image. He seems to be te best example of superstars and insanely famous people putting their fame to work for peace. You see a bit of that these days, with the environmentalists in Hollywood, but really...It is nothing compared to all that Lennon did to try to bring about peace in this world.

I also read a book documenting a conversation between him, Yoko, and Swami Bhaktivedanta. It was called the Search for Liberation. They basically talk about how to achieve levels of upper conciousness, or the quest for holiness, I suppose. It is quite fascinating. I am slowly lending it out to many of my friends who wish to read it.

Good Night to you all.

August 25, 2007


Dan chipped my tooth. Dan Chipped My Tooth.


I kid you not. He hit my toothe with a soda bottle (glass) and he Chipped. My. Tooth.


I used to have perfect teeth and Dan ruined them. Tonight was so much fun though. We were like insane. It was great. Woo.


Not that i have any.

BUT I have been absolutely terrible about keeping up my blog. I hope to make a weekly thing of it, if not more often. So. School has started, which is disgusting because it is so hot out these days. All my teachers are great and I have a feeling that this year is going to be really amazing. Like, incredible amazingness. So I feel really annoyed with myself because I have run out of topics to discuss. So any controversial topics I could discuss?

I could tell you about the hillarious day I had the other day. So at lunch, I went out to the fields and went and lay down in a safe spot all on my own and I turned on my music and sat in the sprinkle of rain. It was very nice until I heard voices come closer and closer. I open my eyes, sit up, and suddenly, Sam, Trent, Devon, and some other people were playing soccer around me. So much for a safe spot. So then they start kicking it around, and I am like, dammit, I am gonna get a concusion from somebody hitting my head with a soccer ball (which is kind of funny because the day I met Trent, he hit me in the stomach with a soccer ball. What a nice connection...). I decided not to move. If I got a concussion, it would mean I might sleep, which I haven't been able to do lately. So eventually, the game moved away from me, and I was left to my peaceful meditations. Or not. A few minutes later, I hear voices come towards me again. Again, I am like, dammit, what now? So I open my eyes, sit up and see Sean and Dan doing a weird run-drop-roll thing. I was horribly confused. They were laughing so hard. The way you laugh when you just absolutely cannot contain yourself but you are doing something reuiring breath, so it comes out like this weird choked up gargle-laugh thing. So maybe you cant see this image, but just try. Running towards me, randomly dropping to the ground, rolling over, getting back up and running again, all the while gargle-laugh-ing. I laughed. i couldn't help it. It was jus tso weird. So then Sean sends some weird glare at me and does a roll right in front of me and then gets up and runs in the ther direction. Obviously, I was all, WTF? So I ask Dan what they were doing-or at least what were they attempting to do. Ninja Rolls. NINJA ROLLS.


So I'm again like wtf and then Dan leaves so I just chalk it up to adolescent insanity, with which I have plenty of experience.

So yeah, I think the year is going pretty well so far for everybody. Even the people in the deepest dulldrums seem happy. No names. God willing, all will go well, and our lives will proceed as usual.

August 08, 2007

On Cemetaries and Coyote Cubs and Mediterranean-style Pizza...

This morning I just had to ge out of the house. I am going a tad bit stir crazy...for example, last night I begged my dad to take me to the grocery store so that I could throw together a pizza...I had no recipe...turned out pretty good in the end...

So anyway, I had to get out of the house so I went for a walk in the cemetary near where I live. As I walked along, I saw what looked like a dead dog lying in the shade on the sidewalk. I didnt do anything. I said "hey" and it sat up and walked away. It was kind of creepy but really awesome too. So I kept walking and when I got to the other side of the cemetary I saw another cub (it was different, this one looked skinier and had mange. I followed it back to where I saw the other one. It ran back into the forest and then I saw a woman get out of her car and follow it into the woods with a camera.. She said that she had seen them before and had called a woman in New York who ran a wildlife rehabilitation program, or something. The woman had asked for pictures just to confirm that they were coyote cubs. Apparently there had been two litters. One of the mothers of one of the litters had been shot. I have no idea what will happen to them. The poor things...

So yeah, I was walking in a cemetary. I love to do it. Especially when it is cold and gray and windy outside. Drama drama drama. Try it some time.

August 07, 2007

On the next school year:

I can be such a lazy ass. Lately all I have been doing is sitting around watching Grey's Anatomy (surprise surprise) and listening to depressing music. Life is back to normal..I can't wait for school to start. I have so many resolutions. I will drink more tea, I will carry less books, stay more organized, keep my room cleaner, hold a happy relationship for more than 2 months long distance. Ok, and for a moment of selfishness (yeah, I get selfish when I am depressed), if I were a guy, I would be over the moon to go out with myself. I mean seriously. I am funny, smart, great personality, and beautiful. So maybe I am the queen of bitch slaps and uncannily similar to Addison, the queen of a "land called passive agressiva" and nicknamed Satan. Done, sorry. Had to get that out. Anyway,hopefully next year will be loads better than this year. We will see about the new math teacher, hopefully she will be good. And don't worry my loyal readers (the number of whom I fear is diminishing), the posts will be up and rampant as the school year starts.

Good night, and good luck.

August 05, 2007


Oh Man. So I remember when I first heard about this "nerd camp" I was going to go to. I was so worried about it being stupid and not being friends with anybody...but I just came back and oh my God. I have never been somewhere so amazing. It is not explainable how incredibly fun it is...everybody accepts you. Everybody is a nerd...It is completely amazing. Completely. My teacher was one of the best teachers I have ever had...I thought that this blog would be longer but there really is absolutely no way to describe how great it was. I took Logic which was fun. There was...oh my God. I CANNOT DESCRIBE IT, DAMMIT!

That is all...I will add as I think of more...

July 08, 2007


OMG so I made muffins today!! They are so good...I pushed rasberries into the top...sooo good.

That is all.

July 05, 2007

Grey's Anatomy

It makes me over-emotional. I finally figured it out. I just fnished watching the second season on DVD and I feel like lying in a big field because it's rainng and I just want to go away. I am so confused about things. And I feel guilty because I feel confused about things that really are totally simple compared to a lot of other peoples' problems. So basically, I feel really confused and then I feel guilty for feeling confused about what I am confused about which makes me miserable and makes me wanna go lie in a field when it is raining. The best part is I don't really know what the hell I am confused about. I try to think of what I am confused about and I can't really think of anything except for one thing which I really can't make any decisions about at this point because there is no way for the situation to move forward.

Right now, I am hot and sticky, I have a head ache, and I feel like eating my mom's home made strawberry orange ice cream. So I am going to go change into shorts, eat some ice cream, and then go to sleep. Maybe watch Pride and Prejudice.

I really need some change in my life. Like, social change. Like, not just get a boyfriend because honestly I have lately been doubting how happy that could actually make me. I just...need somebody new. Like, a breath of fresh air. No offense to my dear friends who are reading this, but I need new faces. My mom talked about what it would be like to move up here to Massachusetts. My dad would send me to a legit New England private school. I would become a legit prep. Weird, huh? But the weirdest part, and the hardest part for me to understand, is that I didn't just instantly say no, I can't leave my friends and my school. I actually sort of thought about what it would be like to move. There would be new people to meet, to get to know, to hate, to love. But then I thought about all the friendships I have here building and getting stronger. No worries, everybody, I am staying, as far as I know.

I really need ice cream.

July 03, 2007



After barely getting enough sleep, we woke in the morning to a water-less and fresh fruit-less breakfast. Oh, and if I didn't mention it before, my roomate was Kim. I love her..

So the second day we went to Lucca. Lucca is the birth place of Puccini and Boccherini and just all these people. It was pretty nice, but kind of boring at the same thing that pissed me off was that instead of looking at the art in the churches (which was veeery interesting..not your typical gothic cathedrals; older, i think), we got to go see the back halls of the conservatry of music. The back halls and the offices. Whoop dee fricking doo. But other than that it was nice. My group was good for the most part and I had an acceptable lunch, although it was hard to eat. Bruschetta. On a huge piece of bread. it all fell off. And the tomatoes were not that great. I keep complaining about the food...and with all the walking it is now wonder I lost like 5 pounds while away. MY GOD I KEEP GOING OFF ON RANDOM SUBJECTS. SO back to Lucca. I bought a purse for myself because I really needed a bigger bag to put maps and dictionary and cameras and stuff in. It's nice. about $18 and poorer quality ones are like $20-25 at Old Navy. I also got my mom a little olive wood vase. The ar
ea in which Lucca is located is ver well known for its olive trees, as is all of Italy. There was this tower in Lucca with a garden on top, but I didn't get to see it.

Overall, I think Lucca was quite nice, but we were all crazy jet lagged and the organization was kind of messed up and we had troubles with my Visa Buxx. When I bought the vase (which was 6 euro) I think the lady didn't want to deal with a debit for that small an amount, so I think she made it not work.

That night was the Opening Ceremony. All the choruses met at the outside of the Tettuccio Spa and
were handed candles. Then, a group of drummers and flag throwers marched up. This flag throwing thing is really incredible...

They dance around and the throwing is all in rythm with the drums and they are so coordinated and they throw the flags like all across the piazza...It is intensely cool.

So then we all walked up the hill to the other spa, the Toretta, and they did another show. I Then we all blew out our candles, or the others did because I didn't take one, and went into the spa. It was beautiful, but not nearly as nice as Tettuccio was going to be. I hadn't been inside it yet.

Inside the spa, the mayor of Montecatini Terme and some other officials all said welcomes and all the stuff they were expected to say. It was then slowly translated into three other languages besides Italian. German, French, and English. I actually understood most of the French. Then a local chorus performed. They were....quite unimpressive. Really didn't hold together, not good voices, but they looked like they were having fun, which is good. The did Va Pensiero, and we did Va Pensiero and we did better and they are Italian. Va Pensiero is basically right next to the national anthem of Italy in importance to the people. It was really ironic.

After all that we just went back to the hotel and crashed. I think that was the first night I was up until 2:30 AM talking with Kim...


As the days go by, I am becoming more and more of a romantic than I was when I started this blog to get my feelings off my back. Fnny ol' world, isn't it? Maybe it was Italy that did it. But I just find myself...not miserable. Like, it isn't what it was when I was miserably single and just using romantic-ness as an excuse. Now it is like, just day dreaming a lot more and swooning over many things unattainable and loving fictional characters (ahem Mr. Darcy ahem).

I guess the book I am reading, Me and Mr. Darcy isn't helping. And in order to explain it I would give it away, so I will not be telling what it is about.

I love Jane Austen..She is so amazing. Didn't she say once that all her characters would have everything they wanted, or something like that? It is totally true. I mean, yes they go through hard times, which makes them so real and easy to relate to. Her books are not your average love story. Instead of the knight almost being killed by a dragon, Mr. Willoughby has to marry for money, or chooses to marry for money, or whatever, I haven't finished Sense and Sensibility yet. But then in the end Marianne ends up marrying the man in love with her and the one that she loves, not the one she lusts for. Lusts. Do you lust for somebody or do you just lust?

ANYHOO! Yeah, Jane Austen definitely gives her characters all that they want. But then as she does she mixes in elements of how it would be in the real world. So my question is, does she stay consistant? In life, will we have those hard times and then come through and get what we want?


So it turns out that I did not havce enough time to keep a diary in Italy. So instead, I am just going to tell as much as I can in separate seperate can't remember how to spell it entries. I will do a different entry for each day.

So the first day. Mom and I got up early to take my Grandfather to the hospital for an appointment. Then we chilled at starbucks for an hour or two. Then we all met up and took a charter bus to the airport at Tampa, where mom and I parted ways. She went back to Massachusetts and I went on to Charlotte. From Charlotte, we flew Lufthansa to Munich. Oh my GOD. The flight took such a long time. It was kind of fun though..I couldn't sleep at all. People got some great photos of Maestro and Mr. Holt sleeping. Lucky guys, they could. The movies were Catch and Release and Freedom Writers, both of which are good-ish, but I had seen Catch and Release before and I cannot stand Hillary Swank. And there wasn't enough of Patrick Dempsey in Freedom Writers to counter balance Hillary. So we got into Munich and from there we flew to Florence and then took a bus into Montecatini Terme. We flew over night so we got there during like the early afternoon or something. We took a quick walking tour of Montecatini Terme.

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Then we went back to the hotel chilled and ate dinner.

Oh Man. The food was sooo bad. Like, really really terrible. It tastes like it comes out of a can. I mean, it isn't inedible, but I expected better from Italy, you know? Like, no fresh fruit in the mornings is in my opinion a sin at hotels in Europe. Other than that, the service was great, the people were very nice, they spoke English very well and the rooms were clean if not small. They were well kept and the location was nice. Not too far from down town, but not much car traffic, mostly just motor scooters going up and down the alleys which is annoying, but cannot be avoided when staying in anything but a farm house, generally. The first day was pretty un eventful.

I have to go eat home made strawberry buttermilk sorbet now (oh calamity).

Yes, my mom bought an ice cream maker. Dear God.

June 25, 2007


Today is my last day in America for a week. I am leaving tomorrow morning....I remember the day we heard that we were going to Italy. It was over a year ago. The time has flown. Flown? Flied? Whatever, the time flew you get it.

So I am going to be keeping a journal while I am there and when I get back I will type it into a post along with the itinerary. I wish I could blog right there but i don't think they have wifi or anything and I didn't bring my laptop. So. God, I am like totally speechless this is so weird.... All my clothes are in my suitcase so I am in Pajamas still.

Lately I have been watching Grey's Anatomy a LOT. Like, a few hours or more every day. It is intense but I love it. Melody lent me the season 1 and 2 DVD sets so...I have them for the rest of the summer! YAY! Which is good because I have only really gotten through like 3 of the 6 discs. So I have to go clean my bathroom now. Sucks. I hate cleaning bathrooms. It is bathroom, I should have the right to have it the way I want.

So have fun with your little lives. I will have fun with mine.

And on another random thought...I have been having a lot of trouble spelling little lately. I will do litlle or litle ot litel. Like, not typo stuff, un-able-to-spell-a-word stuff. Wonder what that means...

June 14, 2007


You know how you take those personality tests online? I love them. Recently, a friend of mine sent me a shortened version of what I think is the Myers Briggs test. Basically you answer a lot of questions and then it tells you what you are with four different letters. You can have:


I got ENFJ.

Basically, I am outgoing, social, attention seeking, emotional, loving, organized, comfortable around others, involved, open, hyperactive, complimentary, punctual, considerate, altruistic, easily hurt, religious, neat, content, positive, affectionate, image conscious, good at getting people to have fun, easily excited, perfectionist, assertive, ambitious, leader, hard working, seductive, touchy, group oriented, anti-tattoos, or so said the the website that had the test. Another source said basically that (except for the random ones, i.e. anti-tattoos, which I am not) I am caring for those around me, loyal in relationships, able to manipulate people around me, I don't like it when controversial issues come up in conversation and make somebody feel uncomfortable, I express my opinions succinctly, and am kind of a neat freak. For more go to this site. Honestly, I agree with pretty much all that this says, although I agree with the second source more than the first. It is sort of scary how precise and how accurate it is!

The good career possibilities are anything involved with performing arts (acting, directing, casting, singing, dancing), interior decorator, hair and makeup stylist, guidance counselor, film critic, party planner, fashion designer, and broadcaster or new anchor.

Almost anything I have ever wanted to do with my life is on that list, except for lawyer. When I saw this, I was shocked.

It went on to say that I was good in relationships, would do anything to keep them going, and preferred long term relationships to flings.

So think about this. I just took this quiz with a bunch or random questions. I pressed submit, and then got a page telling me about myself. For the most part. Essentially everything is correct. How I interact with people, how I act in certain situations, what I like, what I dislike, what I am good and bad at. My character traits, my personality, everything. What type I would make a good couple with!

I read somewhere else that in my old age, I would probably take up gardening or the collection of art. I will also be a fine food and wine connoisseur...I will end up collecting amedieval European tapestries, apparently........

It is really amazing what psychology can determine.

Oh and I also found a list of famous people with the same personality type and jobs I should NOT have.

Famous People:
David, King of Israel
U.S. Presidents:
Abraham Lincoln
Ronald Reagan
William Cullen Bryant, poet
Abraham Maslow, psychologist and proponent of self-actualization
Sean Connery
Elizabeth Dole
Dick Van Dyke
Andy Griffith
James Garner
William Aramony, former president of United Way
Diane Sawyer (Good Morning America)
Randy Quaid (Bye Bye, Love; Independence Day)
Tommy Lee Jones (The Fugitive)
Michael Jordan, NBA basketball player
Johnny Depp (Pirates of the Caribbean)
Oprah Winfrey
Julia Louis-Dreyfus (Elaine on "Seinfeld")
Ben Stiller (The Royal Tenenbaums)
Ben Affleck (The Sum Of All Fears)
John Cusack (High Fidelity)

I cracked up when I saw Johnny Depp and Oprah...

race car driver
computer specialist
airline pilot
computer programmer
financial manager
truck driver
electrical engineer
software designer
web designer
business consultant

apparently, I am a people person so anything that doesn't have to do with relating to people wouldn't be good...and also I shoudln't have a job that only deals with the practical side of things, saying that I am compasionate.